Hold Me Down
by iChuckles
Summary: Betrayed and left to take care of an 11 year old girl. She's determined to do this all on her. Can her friends convince her that she's not on her own? Can Sirius convince her that he's willing to do everything in his power to give her and that little girl everything and more? (SiriusxOC, eventually) Updates: Mon, Thur, Sat
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:** I've written up to chapter 7 so far. This is the first real fan fiction I've written in a while, and the only one I've been consistent with. If you wish to see where this goes I will gladly post the next chapter, but I want to see reviews. Not just good comments, but any suggestions to improve. I'm not above going back and fixing things in this one or other chapters. Constructive criticism is always welcome here! Also, keep in mind, I have not gone back and read it myself. I'm just using this as a test for myself to see if I can actually finish a story for once. Anyways, **Enjoy!**

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The train whistle blew loudly as smoke filled the air of the Hogwarts station once again. Children of all ages scrambled out of the train all too eager to be done with yet another eventful school year. First ran excitedly to their parents as they instantly began to tell them all of the stories they'd accumulated over the year. Older students said their goodbyes and promises of owls and visits over the next few months. While others said their possible last goodbyes before they were thrust into a whole new world much different than the life they'd had at Hogwarts for the past seven years.

Stepping off the train with her best friend, Lily, in tow Tabbitha continued to talk to the other girl about their summer plans. Just then the girls felt two arms snake around their shoulders as they were pulled tight against a warm body.

"Lily love, Tabby cat, how are my two favorite witches today?" It was none other than James Potter, the bane of Lily's existence at Hogwarts and a close friend of the other girls. Giggling Tabbitha watched as the redhead rolled her eyes forcing the unwanted arm away from her as it had stung her.

"What do you want, Potter," spat Lily, as she stood back to glare the intruder crossing her arms over her chest. Following suit Tabbitha stepped out of his grasp as she stood next to her friend watching as they were accompanied by three other boys; Peter Pettigrew, Remus Lupin, and Sirius Black. Having caught the eye of the last one he winked at her sporting his infamous smirk only for her to roll her eyes and shake her head. Typical Black behavior that was.

"Why Lily dearest, I was just wondering if you would like to spend some time together over the summer holiday. I know how much you'll miss," he said, with a cheeky grin and a wink of his.

"As if, Potter, I'd rather spend my holiday with Filch than the likes of you. Come on, Tabbitha, I don't expect we'll having an intelligent conversation around these ones," she said, turning on her heel. While the other boys laughed James looked to Tabbitha for help, but she just shrugged as she followed the redhead away from the "Marauders", whatever that meant.

In between his bark of a laugh Sirius managed to choke out a few words that earned him a smack to the head, "Prongs, she just said you're lower than Filch to her." Followed by glare in the other boy's direction as he rubbed the back of his head as if it had actually hurt.

"Shut it, Padfoot, I know what she said. Now let's go find mum and dad before I leave you here to die," he snarled, as he walked away.

"No need to get your knickers in a bunch, Prongs," he said, before saying his goodbyes to the other boys and following James to find his adoptive parents.

Finally spotting the tired smile of her mother Tabbitha grabbed Lily's hand dragging her towards the older woman. Upon closer inspection she could see a smaller version of herself holding onto the older woman's hand looking around frantically trying to spot her in the thick crowd. Once the two of them pushed through the crowd they watched as a grin broke out on the little girl's face before she let go of her mother's hand darting towards her sister.

"Tabby," squealed the younger, rushing into her sister's waiting arms.

"Anna-banana, I've missed you so much," she said, pulling the younger girl closer to her in a tight embrace.

"I missed you too, sissy," she grinned, having to look up to see her sister's face better. Then out of the corner of her eye she spotted bright red hair. Looking over it seemed that her grin grew even wider, "Lily," she squealed, before launching herself into the older girl's arms.

"Anna, it's so good to see you."

"Guess what, Lily," said Anna, pulling away just as her mother stepped forward.

"What," asked Lily, though she already knew the answer.

"I'm turning 11 this summer, which means that I get to go with you and sissy to school next year, isn't that great," she grinned wide, proud that she was finally old enough to go to Hogwarts the following school term.

"That's wonderful, dear. Do you know what house you want to be in," asked Lily.

"Duh, I'm going to be in Hufflepuff like my big sister," she said matter-of-factly. She'd been saying that ever since she found out about Hogwarts. After all, she wanted to be just like Tabbitha.

A soft laugh took their attention away from the youngest McKinely as their mother walked up. "As fantastic as that is we must be off. Don't want to keep father waiting any longer, do we?" Though her voice was light as she spoke, her eyes shined with worry and fear of the consequences if that were to happen.

"I'll owl you and maybe Anna and you can come visit some time this summer," said Lily, all too aware of the meaning of the older woman's words.

"Yes, that sounds splinded. After all, we have to celebrate someone's eleventh birthday this summer," she chuckled, as the one in question beamed with pride.

Saying their goodbyes the girls hugged before parting ways. Stepping through the wall to the other side the small family made their way through muggle London. Much like the Hogwarts train station, King's Cross was just as busy as ever. People coming to and fro bustled here and there getting to wherever it was they needed to be. Much to her father's disapproval she enjoyed the muggle lifestyle, though, it wasn't as simple as she once thought it to be there were times when she preferred it over her own. At least then she wouldn't have to worry about all of this Dark Lord nonsense spreading like wildfire through the wizarding community.

Having not stopped anywhere it wasn't long before they found themselves at home getting ready for dinner. Though they never prepared the dinner or the table, as they had Tilly for that, they were still required to look presentable at a time like this. What with father having invited over a well known pureblood family. Being one of the lower ones he made it a point to get in as close as possible with families such as; the Black's, the Malfoy's and the Lestrange's, to name a few. Unknown to her they would be playing host to a particular Lestrange who was to be her betrothed, if all went well.

Up in her room she sat at the vanity of her dresser with Anna on her bed reading Witch Weekly while their mother did her hair. Though she knew that someone powerful in the wizarding community was to be attending dinner that evening, she did not know why. Still, she did not feel at ease seeing the look on her mother's face through the vanity mirror. Over the past few years a lot had changed in the McKinely household, a lot that the two older women tried desperately to keep from Anna. For as the world grew darker with each passing day, so did their home.

"Now, dear, you remember what I told you on our way home, right?"

"Yes, mother, I am not to speak unless spoken to," she said, turning in the chair toward her mother.

"That's my girl." And though she smiled, that smile did not reach her eyes. Seeing her mother now Tabbitha saw that the stress from the past few years was starting to take its tole on her young mother's body. Crows feet stretched out from her eyes gripping into the skin with each sad smile that struggled to stay on her lips. Under those once bright blue eyes sat dark, heavy bags that seemed to drag her down further with each passing down. "I can't believe how much you've grown," she whispered softly, holding the side of Tabbitha's face as she gently stroked it with her thumb ,"you look more and more radiant every year."

Before anything else could be said between the two women a loud pop came from downstairs followed by a boisterous, " honey, I'm home." Stepping back from her oldest child she waited as the footsteps grew closer to the room with the same sad smile. "Ah," he said, as he stepped into the room, "there's my favorite girls." Making his way into the room he kissed her mother's cheek before looking at her. "And who might you be, dear?" To which she just rolled her eyes with a playful smirk. "Stand up so that I might see my eldest properly." Obliging his request she stood up smoothing out the emerald green dress that she had been instructed to wear for the evening. "She looks absolutely stunning as always, Michelle. Now where's my youngest?"

With his attention drawn away from her she pleaded with her mother silently, but to no avail. The older woman simply shook her head before drawing her husband's attention to the time and that their guests would be there soon. As the three of them left the room Anna begged to join them for dinner, but was firmly reminded that this dinner was for adults only and that she'd be taking her dinner in her room that night. And as the door closed Tabbitha looked into the mirror as warm, salty tears trickled silently down her face. She had to get this out now otherwise she'd ruin her father's dinner and the fate of one who did that was worse than death.

With the arrival of one Rabastan Lestrange, a former student of Hogwarts 3 years her senior, came tension unlike she'd ever felt before. Something was happening tonight, something that no matter how much she pleaded with her mother to tell her the woman had not budged even a centimeter. Resigned to her fate she made her way slowly down the grand staircase of their large estate, much too large for her taste, to be greeted by her parents and the guest in question. Having spotted her coming down the stairs he looked towards her with a smirk that sent shivers down her spine, but not in a good way.

"Ah, this must be the lovely Tabbitha McKinely. My, my, you two do know how to make them." As he spoke her father looked towards with a pride she hadn't seen in quite some time. Sadly, it was misguided.

Stepping down from the last step Rabastan made his way to the eldest daughter of his business partner. Taking her hand in his own he then kissed the knuckles all the while still boring into her with those coal black eyes of his. Struggling not to frown she'd seemed to have forgotten her manners as a not so subtle cough from her father reminded her of that fact.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Lestrange." She wasn't completely knew to the game of pure blood hierarchy, but that hadn't made it any less stressful on her.

"Please, call me Rabastan. Mr. Lestrange is my father and besides, I understand that I am only three years older than you," he said, now standing up straight.

"Yes, that is true," she replied, hands clasped tightly in front of her. She'd have to be daft to not know where this was going, yet she still hoped and prayed with all her might that it wasn't true.

"I believe it's time we head into the dining room now," spoke her father, after a long moment of silence.

"That sounds wonderful," said Rabastan, never once taking his eyes off of her. "May I," he asked, as he held his arm out for her to hold onto. Without a word she nodded her as looped hers through his following her parents into the dinner room.

For a while everything seemed to be going fine as the conversation went about as normal as one could go in their situation. That was until she spoke without the consent of her father or the man sitting next to her. The conversation had long since strayed from pleasantries and her time at school thus far and soon diverged into politics between the men as the women watched on silently. Had she not spoken maybe things would have been different that summer.

"It's ridiculous." That was all she said and that was all she needed to say. The clanking of silverware against the plate was heard as her mother audibly gasped while her father glared on disapprovingly. The only one unfased by her comment was Rabastan as he made a point to smirk as silence fell over the room.

"What did you say young lady," her father growled through gritted teeth. Having realized her error she slowly set down the fork in her hand as she cast her gaze down her lap.

"I apologize, father. I spoke out of turn." Before he could continue to berate her Rabastan spoke up on her behalf.

"Now now Michael, let's hear what the girl has to say," he said calmly, turning his gaze to her once again. "What do you think of the Dark Lord and his plans for our people?" Of course, he meant purebloods and the purge of anything otherwise. And though it seemed on the surface he was being kind she knew that it was a front. A lie to cause her to dig the hole she'd already dug with those two words deeper.

Looking to her mother briefly the older woman would not meet her gaze and she dared not look at her father. So, she opted to finding interest in a far off point behind her mother's head. "I do not have an opinion on the matter. Now if you'll excuse me," she said, as she set the napkin on her lap back on the table making to get up, but was stopped the moment Rabastan grabbed her wrist.

"Oh but you do and I would love to hear the opinion of our savior from my future wife." If the air in the room hadn't already been thick, it would have been then. Stopping where she stood she looked to her mother still to no avail and then to her father who said nothing as well. As his words continued to replay in her head the rage inside of her boiled higher and higher, but she contained herself. She would not lash out, not her anyways. With her wrist still his grasp she closed her eyes for a bit longer than a standard blink before opening them with looking as impassive as possible.

"My apologies again, but may I be excused to my room? I wish to process this information that has been given to me." At her words he let go of her wrist.

"You're dismissed," spoke Rabastan, to which she nodded curtly before walking back up to her room. She did not bother to wait to hear what might have been said after her departure, right now she needed to be alone.

Upon entering her room she began to tear every last bobby pin out of her hair with such force that it seemed those that was the cause of her tears and frustration. By the time she got to her vanity the floor had been littered with the small objects as a sort of deterrent for anyone wishing to enter her domain. Stopping in front of the mirror she ripped out the last of them letting them fall to the ground with the rest of them. Gripping onto the edge of the vanity she watched in frustration as the tears continued to flow without any sign of stopping.

Just then there was a soft knock at the door. Not wanting to be seen in such a compromising situation she quickly dried her tears standing up straight smoothing out her dress as she walked over to the door. Opening it she saw Anna staring up at her with those big brown eyes she loved so much. Without a word the youngest McKinely rushed into her sister's arms as the older closed the door collapsing in the process bringing Anna with her. Once again, the tears began to fall, and for a while they just sat there holding each other for in that moment and in times to come they were all each other had.


	2. Chapter 2

The following weeks passed by quietly. They rarely saw Mr. McKinely as he was busy with the ministry and other extra curricular activities, as Mrs. McKinely had began to call it. Half way through the summer she and Anna had received an invite from Lily to come visit for a week. The girl's took her up on her offer and were whisked away for an actual vacation. All too soon though, they found themselves back at the McKinely manor unprepared for what was to come.

It was late July when their father began to act even more peculiar than before. Coming home at all hours of the night, mumbling to himself as he went about the house and locking himself in his study whenever he was home for extended periods of time. Restricted to the second floor they were never aware of the visitors he would receive late at night, until that night.

It was late and Anna had come to find solace in sharing a bed with her big sister. The next day was her 11th birthday and the day she was to receive her Hogwarts letter. While the younger girl slept Tabbitha made quick work of the present she'd been working on for quite some time, but stopped when she heard a pop. Someone downstairs had apparated away, but that wasn't unusual. What was unusual were the loud screams of her father. Glancing up from her position on the floor she saw Anna stir in her sleep before she quickly hid the gift under her bed. Crawling back in she pulled the girl close to her shushing her soft whimpers as she smoothed out her frazzled hair.

Just then the sound of something breaking downstairs startled the young girl awake. "Sissy, what was that," she grumbled, rubbing her eyes with the back of her hands.

"I don't know, but it doesn't sound good," she said, looking towards the door listening for anything else. When silence followed she looked to Anna grasping her shoulders trying to get her attention, "look at me Anna, I want you to stay up here, ok? Stay up here and do not come out. Do you understand? If I'm not back in ten minutes I want you to floo to the Potter's and have them get help, ok?"

"But sissy, I want to go with you," she pleaded, so close to crying.

"It's going to be ok, but I need you stay safe, ok?" The girl nodded her head as Tabbitha smiled at her before kissing her head. Slowly and silently she slipped out of bed grabbing her wand off of the night stand. Though she wouldn't be of age for another few hours, and yes, she had the same birthday as her little sister, she'd rather face punishment for using magic outside of school underage than go down there unprotected.

Creeping to the door she pressed her ear to it as Anna pressed her back against the headboard of the bed. When she heard nothing she slowly turned the door handle until she heard a soft click. Opening it just as slowly she closed it behind her once in the hallway before making her way down the hall and the stairs. Once downstairs she could hear the faint sounds of angry whispers from her father's study. All of the lights were off, but she would use that to her advantage.

"Tilly," she whispered, before a soft pop sounded next her.

"Yes, miss," inquired the little house elf.

"I want you to help Anna pack a small bag of essentials then floo with her to the Potter's, can you do that for me, Tilly?"

"Yes, miss, Tilly will take care of Ms. Anna." With her mind slightly more at ease she began to walk away only to stop when Tilly added, "please be careful Ms. Tabbitha. Master is not himself anymore." And with that the house elf popped upstairs.

"Oh, I know," she whispered to herself, making her way down the hall. The only light came from under the door of her father's study where the whispers grew louder. Not wanting to alert them to her presence she stood against the wall so as to not cause a shadow on the light with wand at the ready.

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"I'm doing this for your protection, Michelle. Do you know what he'd do to us if he even so much as thought we weren't on his side? Do you know what he'd to our girls," her father all but yelled.

"He's not going to win, Michael. There are too many people who will oppose him when the time comes," her mother countered.

"And he has more than enough followers to beat the opposition. He will win and I want to be on that side. What about you, Michelle? What side do you want to be on when the smoke clears?"

Though she could not hear her mother's reply she did hear the distinct sound of a hand colliding with her face. Emboldened by her father's act of abuse she burst into the room wand pointed at the mad man she once looked up to. Neither of which had expected her as they both looked at her in shock that quickly faded when from her father's face only to be replaced with a sneer like she'd never seen before.

"You were told to not come down here unless told to," he snarled, stomping up to her grab her arm. Just as he made to take her back upstairs her mother got off of the floor grabbing her wand and pointing it at her husband.

"Get your hand off of my daughter." Taken aback for a moment she watched as the two glared at each other for a moment before he began to laugh not letting go of her.

"Or, what?"

"Expelliarmus," shouted her mother, causing his wand to fly of out of his and across the room. Growling he let go of Tabbitha's arm as he lunged at his wife who side stepped him causing him to crash into his desk. Now she wore the smirk, "you were always bad at dueling. Maybe that's why you're being a coward by joining him."

Huffing and puffing from the adrenaline he pushed himself up and away from the desk as he replied with, "at least I'll be alive and safe when the war begins and when it ends." Just then Tabbitha watched as he opened up a secret compartment in his desk where he hid his actual wand. As he turned to point it at her mother she shouted at her mother to watch out, but he did not turn to his wife instead he turned to his daughter, "AVADA KEDAVRA."

Frozen in place she watched as the seen played out before her not even hearing the sounds of several pops from nearby. Instead all she could focus on was her mother diving in front of the curse that had been sent her. The green flash of magic struck the older woman as she fell to the ground in a lifeless heap at her daughter's feet. It all happened so fast and yet, so slow.

Tears began to fall as she collapsed to her knees right when several aurors, including famed Mad-Eye Mood stormed into the room. There was a lot of shouting from both sides as they detained the murderer, but all she saw was her mother's lifeless body. Crawling forward she grabbed onto the woman who had raised her since birth cradling her head in her lap. In the distance of her mind she felt a hand on her shoulder, but paid it no mind. As she continued to look into her mother's lifeless eyes it became harder and harder to breathe as the edges of her vision began to blur.

"She's going into shock," shouted one of the aurors. That was when a chocolate bar was thrust into her line of site.

"Eat this," spoke the gruff voice of the auror holding the candy out to her.

Not having the energy to take it from him she reached out with her mouth and took a bite of it. As she chewed it slowly her surroundings became much more clear. There were five aurors currently in the room. One on either side of her, one in front of her and two checking the room for anything suspicious. When she swallowed the first bite she felt that it had become easier to breathe.

"What happened," it was the one who'd said she was going into shock that asked.

"I-I don't know. One minute, Anna and I…," pausing she realized that she did not know where her sister was. Wide eyed she became frantic, "oh no, where's Anna? Where's my sister?"

"Shhhh, it's ok. Anna's safe with the Potter's like you told her, but what I need you to do is tell me anything you may leading up to tonight?" And with that she began to tell them of what had happened two years prior and everything in between that revolved around her father. Once it she was finished the auror that she had come to know as Tanya helped her pack the essentials before apparating with her the Potter's.

"If you need anything, anything at all do not hesitate to contact me," she said, handing the girl a card with her name and address on it. Mutely she nodded her head as she walked up to the door bag in hand. Before she could knock on the door it flew open revealing a wild mane of red hair that lunged itself at her holding onto her as if she wasn't real. Looking past the red hair she spotted the familiar brown eyes of James Potter as he looked on with a sad smile. Standing next to him was Sirius Black looking just as concerned.

She broke. Tears fell from her eyes as violent sobs racked her body causing her to crumble to her knees. It took both James and Lily to pull her inside followed by the pop of Tanya leaving. Inside they pulled her to the small library where Lily held her friend close as they wept for the loss of an amazing woman and mother.

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 **AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

Thank you to, **juneb** , for the review. I'm glad the first chapter at least got one. Any chances of more after posting this one so soon? xD


	3. Chapter 3

The sun had just broke through the horizon as Tabbitha blinked a few times before rubbing her eyes to get rid of any sleep out of her eyes. In her tired state she thought she was in her bed, but it was much harder than she remembered. That was when it hit her like a freight train. All of the events of the night before came flooding back in. Before they could steer her focus from the current situation at hand she mentally slammed that flood gate shut as she sat up slightly. In front of James lay on his back with arm splayed out while the other rested against his stomach as his mouth hung open emitting the occasional snore. Looking down and behind her she saw Lily laying on her side facing her with one arm tucked underneath her head as a pillow and the other draped across her stomach with her legs curled up towards.

If she remembered correctly she was in the Potter manor and the three of them were in the library. She assumed that Anna was in one of the many bedrooms that the manor had. After all, Tanya had said she was ok, unlike their mother. Not only was today the girls' birthday, but Tabbitha would have to make funeral arrangements if not today, most likely tomorrow.

It was then that a small cough drew her attention to the couch. Looking over she saw Sirius laying on it as he watched her. With a sigh she sat up right taking her eyes away from him. Needing to stretch her now sore back she twisted left then right as her back popped and cracked to sort of relieve the tension she felt.

"Bloody hell, was that you?" Startled she looked over to see James sitting up as he yawned before looking at her wide eyed.

"Y-yeah…," she said with a small shrug.

"I'm surprised you didn't break your back doing that," he laughed, all too loudly waking up Lily in the process.

"Shut up, Potter, you can wake the dead with that laugh," said the redhead, as she too sat up yawning in the process before she realized that Tabbitha was awake. "Oh my, Tabby, how are you doing this morning? Did you sleep well? I'm sure you're positively starving. We should've gotten you to a bed last, but…," it was then that James had taken the opportunity to scoot behind Tabbitha and next to Lily to cover her mouth with his hand.

"I think we need to leave her be for now. She's had a long night and probably needs some time to sort things out," he said, letting go of her mouth. As she made to speak again he held up a finger, "ah ah, now let's go find mom and see if she'll help us make breakfast for everyone, ok?" He stood up holding his hand out to her. For a moment the girl hesitated looking to her friend then back to the hand offered to her.

"If you need anything let us know." And with that she took James' hand to help her stand up, but let go once she was. Though it was a rejection his smile didn't falter as it was one small victory for Team Potter, as he would say. Letting her lead the way the two of them stepped out of the library leaving Tabbitha and Sirius in silence.

Sitting on the rug in front of the fireplace Tabbitha brought her knees to her chest struggling to keep her mind blank. Struggling to keep the memory of her mother's death out of her mind, but it was hard. With her head buried in her arms she kept her eyes closed willing the images of her father casting the spell that should have ended her life. She should be dead not her mother. That spell was meant for her. The more she thought on it the more her heart began to race and the more her breathing became erratic. Soon she found it difficult to breathe and it sounded as if there was a strong wind blowing in her ears making it so that she did not hear the footsteps coming towards her. At that moment, right when she was about to fall off the ledge two strong hands came down on her shoulders gently followed by a voice.

"Tabby-cat, look at me." Slowly she raised her head only to be met with Sirius' gray eyes. "I need you to take a deep breath for me, but keep your eyes on me, can you do that for me?" Nodding her head she inhaled deeply followed by a ragged exhale. "Now, tell me three things you see in this room."

Glancing around her eyes landed on the couch, "there's a couch." Looking around some more she spotted the fireplace, "and a fireplace." And with one more glance around she said, "and there are bookcases," before bringing her eyes back to his. It was then that she realized her increased heart rate had slowed down to normal as well as her breathing. This wasn't her first panic attack, but it was the first one that anyone had brought her down from so easily. "How?"

Plopping down next to her Sirius faced towards the windows as he shrugged, "Remus has had them before and that's what has always worked for him. Figured I'd give it a go with you." Nodding her head she just stared at the wall that she was facing.

As he opened his mouth to speak Lily walked back in with a letter in her hands. "It's from Professor McGonagall," she said, handing the letter over to Tabbitha.

Opening it she read it silently aware of Sirius reading over her shoulder. "It says she'll be here in a couple of hours to help me in…," her voice trailed off unable to say the words. They only cemented the fact that this was all real and not just some elaborate dream that her brain had cooked up. Her mother was dead and she, being the oldest, had to plan the funeral. Handing it to Lily she hung her head fighting back the tears that threatened to spill over. Closing her eyes as she took a few deep breaths to calm her down she felt Sirius wrap his arms around her from behind now as he rested his forehead on her shoulder.

"Why is Minnie helping with your mother's funeral arrangements," asked James, having popped in right before Lily had received the letter from Tabbitha.

"She's my godmother," she shrugged as if that wasn't the weirdest thing in the world.

"You never told me that Professor McGonagall was your godmother," balked Lily, sitting down on the couch. Even Sirius lifted his head up in shock to look at the brunette next to him. As he looked at her though the more he realized that this must be her natural hair color. He was so used to seeing her with different hair colors thanks to her metamorphagus gene that he hadn't realized that it was a simple chocolate brown that fell loosely down her back tickling his neck.

"I guess it slipped my mind. Anyways, I should probably check on Anna and get ready." Pulling out of Sirius' arms he had struggled internally to let her go wanting to hold the incredibly broken girl, but he knew she had things she needed to do. And with that she left the study to go check on her sister asking Mrs. Potter on the way where they had put her.

After she left the three of them sat in silence when it was disturbed by Lily gasping audibly. "What, what is it," asked James frantically.

"Today is their birthday," she said, wide-eyed looking between the two.

"Wait, so what you're saying is that they have the same birthday exactly six years apart," said James, trying to understand what Lily was getting at.

"Yes, don't you see, that means that Tabbitha is 17 as of today and Anna is 11. That means that this is Anna's first year at Hogwarts, she should be getting her letter if she already has it and…," she said, trailing off before something else dawned her and the rest of them. "That means…."

"They lost their mother the day before their birthday and now Tabbitha has to spend it planning a funeral." Casting their eyes down none of them knew what to do. Having known Tabbitha for so long they knew she'd probably forget her own birthday in lieu of recent events. If anything Lily knew she'd at least remember her sister's, but forgo reminding anyone of her own. It was then that Mrs. Potter walked in letting them know that breakfast was ready. When they got to the table Mr. Potter sat at one end with an extremely tired Anna few seats away.

"Good morning sleepy head," whispered Lily, sitting next to the girl while James took the seat to the girl's right with Sirius sat across from them. The little girl said nothing in return opting to stare at the table through half lidded eyes. Deciding it best to not push her to talk Lily opted to filling the younger girl's plate with her favorites once food had appeared. It was half way through the breakfast when a pop sounded from the living room.

"Is anybody home," called Minerva from the other room.

"We're in the dining room, Minnie," replied Mrs. Potter, soon followed by the other woman walking in. "She should be down in a moment. Would you like some breakfast, Minni?"

"On no, but thank you, I already ate before I came," she said, though she did sit down next to Mrs. Potter. Leaning closer to the older woman, "how are they?" As she spoke she glanced over at the youngest McKinely as she picked at her food having barely eaten anything with Lily and James trying to get her to eat while Sirius just laughed to himself at their failed attempts.

"Not so good, Minnie," sighed Mrs. Potter.

"No, I suspect they wouldn't be so good. After all, they did just lose their mother on their birthday," she whispered, still watching little Anna pick at her food as Mrs. Potter gasped softly.

"Is that so?" Sirius having caught her eye nodded his head solemnly.

"I'm afraid so, which makes this one here 11 as of today. That reminds me," as she spoke she reached into her robes to pull out a letter. "Anna McKinely," she spoke in the voice that got anyone's attention when heard. Lifting her head up she looked at the woman blinking slowly not having heard her come in. "I understand today's your birthday and that you are 11 now, is that so?" The young girl nodded her head slowly unsure of what this woman was getting at. "In that case, I have something for you," with that said she handed the letter to Lily who then gave it to the now wide eyed girl. Holding it in her hands she began read aloud after opening it.

"Dear Ms. McKinely,  
We are pleased to inform you that you have a place at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment." Stopping there she looked up wide eyed glancing around at everyone still watching her.

"I apologize for getting it to you so late. It seems as if someone has been intercepting my owls to you for the past two weeks," said Minerva, looking around the room as they all knew who had been behind that.

"I was wondering when you'd actually get your letter, because I distinctly remember getting mine in June." At the sound of Tabbitha's voice all eyes at the table looked to her. Seeing her big sister a wide grin broke out on Anna's face as she pushed away from the table, jumped down from her chair and ran to her sister.

"I'm going to Hogwarts, sissy," squealed the little girl in excitement.

"I heard. Are you excited," she asked, though she already knew the answer.

"Yeah! I'm gonna be in Hufflepuff just like you, sissy." Even Minerva smiled warmly at the little girl's enthusiasm.

"Is that so? Well, I guess we'll just find out for sure come September 1," she said, getting down to Anna's height. "Now, I have to leave for a bit, but I promise we will do whatever you want when I get back."

"Anything?"

"Anything, but only if you eat all of your breakfast and you're good for the Potter's while I'm gone," said Tabbitha, matter-of-factly. With a high pitched 'ok' the younger girl ran around the table to climb back in her chair to finish her breakfast.

"Are you ready, Tabbitha," asked Minerva, now standing up from her chair. With a nod of her head the two women made their way to the living room followed by Sirius. Grabbing onto Tabbitha's arm he stopped her in tracks as she looked back at him.

"I can go with you… for support. You don't have to do this alone," he said, eyes full of concern.

Placing her hand on his she gave it a squeeze before releasing it from his grasp, "I'll be fine, Sirius, besides I won't be alone I have Minnie." With that she stepped away as Minerva asked she was ready to which reminded her that she could indeed apparate on her own now as she was of age.

It was Mr. Potter who came up behind him as he stared at the spot where she once stood only moments before. "She'll come to you when she's ready, son." And with that he head patted the boy on the back before heading to his study.

"Hey Pads, I just owled Remus and Peter to come play quidditch with us, wanna join," shouted James from the dining room snapping the other boy back to reality.

"Only if I get to play Keeper this time," he shouted back, turning around to walk back to the table.

"I wanna be seeker," piped up Anna, to which everyone laughed as they began to clear the table. Though the air had grown considerably lighter there still hung a cloud over them weighing on their minds, but they knew they needed to keep Anna occupied. She was still a child and they were determined to keep it that way.

* * *

 **Author's Note:**  
 **I have decided to updated this every Monday, Tuesday and Thursday in an effort to finish something for once in a reasonable time. I have no exact plan for this as of yet, and I haven't actually written anymore chapters past 7. So, hopefully with a schedule in place I'll actually keep up with it. Let me know what you think so far and if there is anything you wish to see happen in future chapters. Enjoy!**


	4. Chapter 4

By the time 4 pm had rolled around they had finally finished preparations for the funeral that was to be held in two days time. Though Tabbitha had tried to have it the following day it was advised to give it some time so that anyone who wished to attend would be able to make the necessary arrangement to do so.

Walking out of the funeral building Tabbitha and Minerva parted ways with promises of her returning for said occasion. When she finally left Tabbitha decided that now was an appropriate time to pop on over to her old home. Apparating there was quick and painless for her as she had side longed with others before. Now with her feet firmly on the ground in the foyer she looked around the large house. If she was just a random person popping in she would not have been able to tell that something dark had happened in this once happy home the night before.

"Tilly," she called, as she made her way up the grand staircase soon followed by a pop in front of her at the top.

"Yes, miss," inquired the little house elf.

"Would you mind gathering my first year school supplies using this list and sending it to the Potters? Cross off anything we already have so that I know what to get Anna before school," she said, handing over Anna's school supplies list upon stepping off of the last step.

"Yes, miss, does miss need anything else before Tilly goes?"

"No, Tilly, thank you." And with that the elf popped away to where they'd taken to storing all of Tabbitha's leftover school supplies and books from the last 6 years. Even though they did have money, and her mother had intended to buy brand new things for Anna's first year, Tabbitha thought it wise to hold off on spending any actual money till she knew their financial situation. With their mother dead and their father in Azkaban it was likely that any assets that their mother had to her name would go to the girls, but that their father had would either be frozen or go to them. She was more inclined to believe that the former would be the case, at least until she was able to obtain a proper lawyer to gather said assets. For as it stood, Anna was officially in her care till further notice.

Walking down the hall towards her room she waited to hear her little sister running up the down the hall giggling with their dad chasing her, but that didn't happen. Instead the hall was silent and dark, except for the light coming through a window down at the end. Once at her room she found that she'd forgotten to close it when leaving that night. With a slight push of her hand it slowly creaked open to reveal the bed unmade, but other than that, it was spotless. Taking a deep breath she set about packing the rest of her clothes in a trunk not unlike her school trunk, having already prepared that weeks in advance for the coming school year. Half way through the process there was a pop down stairs. Someone had apparated into her home without her knowledge.

Dropping what she was doing, which left a shirt on the side of the trunk, she crept silently to the still closed door to her room leaving the other side open. With her back against the door she listened closely as the footsteps grew closer and closer until they were right at her door. At that moment she leaped out from hiding wand pointed at the intruder ready for a fight.

"Woah, slow down there, it's just me," said Remus, on the other side of the door.

Relaxing her shoulders she breathed a sigh of relief as she stepped back to let him in before lightly punching him in the arm, "don't ever sneak up on me like that again, Lupin."

"Sorry, didn't mean to. Guess I should have said something," he said, with an apologetic grin as he rubbed his arm where she had hit him.

Turning back to her work she called over her shoulder going back to what she was doing, "how did you know to find me here? I assume James or Sirius told you what happened."

"Sirius said he figured you'd be here. He should be by shortly to help out. Said he had something to do at home first." When she shot him an odd look he added, "ah, that's right you didn't know. He got his own flat at the beginning of summer. Said he didn't want to keep imposing on the Potter's like that." At that her heart sank realizing she was doing just that and vowed silently to find her and Anna a place the following summer as he continued, "they tried to convince him otherwise. He would hear nothing of it. Oh, I've never seen this before." When she looked over he was holding up a particularly daring little black dress that her mom had insisted on buying her to make up for the horrible news she'd received her first night home.

"Give me that," she said, snatching it out the air and shoving into her trunk all the while he just chuckled. Closing it she realized how thankful she was that she'd packed her underwear and lingerie before he'd got there. Her mother had been all about making sure her daughters felt beautiful.

Another pop sounded from the living room followed by a familiar voice, "honey, I'm home." Looking to Remus with a 'you're kidding me right' look he just shrugged his shoulders before calling back.

"We're upstairs in Tabby-cat's room." Followed by loud footsteps running up the stairs taking two at time. Before long the boy with long black hair and mischievous gray eyes popped into the room.

Looking between the two he grinned, "what'd I miss?" To which she just rolled her eyes and turned away going over her mental list of things she wanted and could do without for now. She'd leave Tilly in charge of the estate till they were done with school.

"We just finished packing for miss Tabby here, though, she hasn't told me what we're doing next." Somehow his words triggered her memory of why she had initially come home. Dropping to her knees she went to her stomach as the boys watched her curiously.

"Oi, watchu doing down there," asked Sirius, tilting his head a bit. A moment later she popped out from under the bed with a present as she sat up. "Aw, you shouldn't have."

"Smack him for me," she said to Remus, adding, "this isn't for you Black."

"Back to last names, Tabby cat? You wound me," he said, hand over his heart still sporting that grin even as Remus smacked him upside his head. To which she just rolled her eyes.

"No, this is for Anna. Today's her birthday and I'd almost forgotten that this was here," she said, now looking at the box as memories of making the contents of it with her mother almost a month prior flooded back in.

"Isn't it your birthday as well," asked Remus, snapping her back to reality as she wiped away the few tears that had managed to fall.

"Hush, don't remind me. After all, this is her big day. She's eleven years old and convinced she'll be Hufflepuff with me, though, I disagree," she said as she beamed a smile at them before standing up to put the present in her regular trunk.

"Oh, and what house do you think she'll be in? Hmmm," said Sirius, crossing his arms over his chest cocking one brow.

Walking past the boys to her door she said over shoulder, "Gryffindor, of course. Now come help me pack her things so we can get out of here. This place gives me the creeps."

And with that the three friends packed up Anna's room before heading back to the Potter's with everything in tow. When they got there Mrs. Potter let them know that the others had just sat down for dinner. Peter had shown up in the time that they had been gone and Anna was once again sat between James and Lily asking them all sorts of things about Hogwarts. Standing in the doorway of the dining room she felt a soft squeeze on her shoulder as Remus passed her to sit down, immediately asking for someone to pass him the mashed potatoes as they had already doled out the roast for everyone.

"When dinner's over, can I talk to you," asked Sirius, from beside her.

"Sure, what's up," she asked, to which he just shook his head.

"After dinner." He then sat down in front of James with Remus in front of Lily and Peter to Remus' left leaving the seat between Sirius and Remus open. Sitting down she pushed thoughts of the last few days and the next few out of her mind simply taking a moment to enjoy this lull of peace in her life. Unsure of what the future held for her and Anna, and of what Sirius wanted to talk about.


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's Note:** So, it seems I made a boo boo in scheduling when I'll update. The right days are now in the description on when I'll be updating. Now because I made said mistake I've decided to go ahead and post this chapter as an apology for any confusion. So just to clarify the following days are when I'll be updating for now on; Monday, Thursday and Saturday, and yes, that means there will be another update at some point tomorrow.

 **Shout out to the few that have reviewed as well as my followers. I hope each and every one of you continues to read and enjoy this, as I have to come to enjoy it.**

 **Thank you and have a wonderful day!**

* * *

Much like the night before she found herself in the Potter's library curled up in front of the fireplace. She'd just sent Anna up to bed a few moments before after promising that she'd take her to Diagon Alley for the rest of her school supplies. It came as no surprise when the young girl had gladly taken all of Tabbitha's old school books and supplies. Though it was obvious that she still needed quite a bit.

Staring at the fire burning bright she recalled back on how Mrs. Potter had insisted on making them each a cake as everyone sang happy birthday. Even though she protested that they only needed to celebrate Anna's they would have nothing of it. And it also came as no surprise that Anna enjoyed her present. It was a giant blanket with the Hogwarts crest on it. What was special about it was that it was change to her house crest on sorting night, much like Tabbitha's own throw blanket that she sat wrapped in. In bright yellow and black the blanket sported the Hufflepuff badger proudly. She had her legs crossed as she nursed a soon to be cold cup of hot cocoa.

"Would you like some more," came Sirius' voice from the door, closing it behind him as he walked in the room.

"No, I'm ok," she said, shaking her head not taking her eyes from the flames. She knew why he was there, but she wasn't sure why she was scared.

"Did Remus tell you where I had gone before I met you at yours," he asked, sitting down next to her bringing his knees up to rest his arms on them.

"Yeah, he said you had something to do at your place. Why do you ask?"

"I was busy setting things up today while you were gone and I was hoping it wouldn't be in vain." He sounded unsure as he scratched the back of his head. This wasn't the Sirius she was used to. The Sirius she was used to was sure everything and now he seemed almost scared.

"Setting up what? And why would it be vain," she asked, now turned towards him a look of concern etched across her features.

For a moment he was silent not looking at her at all. Then, he took a deep breath and said something she hadn't quite expected, "I want you and Anna to move in with me. I have two bedrooms. You can each have one and I'll just sleep on the couch. I know we're just friends and I suspect you want to keep it that way, but-," she stopped him mid sentence pressing a finger to his lips.

"Sirius, I can't. I know you mean well, but I just can't do that to you." Dropping her finger she stood up setting the mug on the table behind them as she held onto the blanket as a sort of protection. As she walked away towards the door he stood up grabbing onto her wrist so as to stop her.

"Why not? We don't have to do anything, you and I. We will remain as just friends, and besides, I know you are thinking about where you and Anna are going to live when you get out of school. And if I know you at all I know that you won't stay here for the same reason I'm not. Please, at least consider it," he pleaded with her.

"I can't." With that he let her slip out of his grasp as she walked out of the room closing the door behind her and leaving him there alone.

The next day found him lounging in his boxers eating crackers and drinking beer on his couch at his flat. With his feet propped up on the coffee table he leaned back in the chair mouthing the words to whatever song came on the muggle radio. He'd gotten when shopping for things for his flat. So zoned out he hadn't heard the pops of people apparating into his apartment behind him.

"Oi, the sun's still up, what are you doing drinking so early?" Laughed James from behind him as he gave his shoulder a firm shake.

"Dunno. Just felt like it," he shrugged, not looking either of the men that had popped in unannounced. "Beers' in the fridge. Help yourselves."

"Don't mind if I do. Want one Moony," asked James walking into the small kitchen.

"I'm alright," he declined, sitting to Sirius' left. "Mind telling us why you've decided to drink alone on a Sunday morning in nothing but your skippies?"

Before he could say anything James piped up with, "oh that's easy. Tabbitha declined his offer of sharing his home with her and Anna when she's done with school." To which Sirius glared at him for answering a question directed at him.

"I figured she'd say no." At Remus' words Sirius turned the glare towards him. "Don't you look at me that way, Padfoot. You know as well as I do that she's too independent to take you up on your offer." Before Sirius could protest he added in, "even if, she was aware of your feeling she would have still said no."

"How do you know that? How do you know she wouldn't have returned my feelings and taken the offer? How, Moony," Sirius spat, sitting up as he nearly spilled the bag of crackers that James' quickly snatched before his friend made a mess.

"I'm not saying she wouldn't return your feelings," he paused, sighing before continuing, "all I am saying is that no matter what she'd still say no. She doesn't want to be a burden on anyone. I'm sure she's got it in her mind that she has to do this on her own. She wants to brave and strong for Anna's sake. You see the way they are together. Anna looks up to her sister. In her eyes Tabbitha can do no wrong and is the strongest and most talented witch she's ever known. And she's taken it upon herself to raise the girl.

"Which means she's probably scared that you or anyone else will eventually realize that they don't want someone as young as Anna around and she'll be out of the street. She's determined to stand on her own two feet from the start."

Sirius now hunched forward with his head down still holding the now warm bottle of beer. He heard and understood everything that Moony had said. It all made sense and he could see what his friend meant, but he still didn't know why. Why she had to do this on her own. They all knew she was more than capable of achieving great things. Top of their class, quidditch captain, prefect with a strong desire to be an auror, the girl had everything going for her. So, why couldn't she let her friends help her? Why wouldn't she let him help her?

Sighing he set the beer on the table as he stood up walking over the window. Looking out he realized that life in muggle London would continue on as usual while their world crumpled. Before he could delve into his thoughts deeper James piped.

"Well, no sense in moping around while we still have two weeks till school starts. Let's go have some fun. What do ya say, Pads?"

"Sounds great," he said, shooting a grin at his friends before going to his room and getting ready for whatever shenanigans they were bound to get into. He'd think about Tabbitha later, but for now he wanted to enjoy his last true summer holiday.


	6. Chapter 6

Tuesday morning rolled around faster than anyone had anticipated. As was expected there was a light drizzle as clouds hung heavy over their heads taunting them, really. Acting as though they would burst any minute, but only continued the long slow drizzle that was rain since earlier that morning.

In her room at the Potter's she stood in front of the full length mirror as Lily pulled the zipper up on her dress dusting off any remaining lint. The dress itself wasn't anything spectacular. She'd had to grab it last minute at a muggle thrift shop with Lily the day prior as it had been some time since the last funeral she'd attended and the old dress no longer fit.

Smoothing out the dress she sighed as she grabbed her mother's old hat that she'd worn to her parent's funeral nearly ten years prior. It was a small round hat that sat to the side of her head with a small net veil that covered her face. The heels she wore were simple, yet stylish and also second hand. Having been accustomed to thrifting with Lily throughout the years it was nothing new for her to be wearing second hand clothes. In fact she preferred them most of the time. To her they had character and a back story that the girls would think of as they perused the many racks of some of their favorite shops.

Gloves pulled on snuggle she turned around to her friend who gave her a half smile before hugging her. "I don't know what I'm going to do, Lily. I'm still a kid myself. How am I going to raise one," she mumbled into the other girl's shoulder.

"Everything will be ok and we'll talk about the fine details later. Right now there are guests waiting for your arrival," said Lily, holding the girl at arms length. "Just remember, you don't have to do this alone." At that she walked out of the room as Tabbitha watched her walk away. In the doorway stood an extremely dapper looking Sirius with his hands shoved into his dress robe pockets. Pushing back his hair he gave her a weak smile she was unable to return.

"Sirius, I…," she stopped, unsure of what to say after their last encounter.

"It's ok. We don't have to talk about it. I'm only here to escort you." To which she gave him a weak smile of her own as he held out his arm for her to take. Then right before apparating he added, "just think about it." And just lack that they were transported from the comfort of her room to the right outside the church where the funeral was to be held.

Inside the church she recognized a few faces here and there, while others she had never seen before. With Sirius at her side she made her way up to the front pew next to her sister. Sitting down she grabbed onto Anna's hand squeezing it tight as the little girl struggled to hold back the tears with Lily on her right holding her other hand while Sirius held Tabbitha's.

The service was beautiful and well protected with aurors stalking the grounds of the cemetery at every corner. Several people had many amazing things to say about her mother. Things she had forgotten about in the past several years. She'd be lying to herself if she said she did not resent her mother for staying with the shell of a man that once was her husband. These people had known her mother much longer than she had obviously, but many of them she had never seen in their most desperate time of need and she hated them too. Finally, when it was her turn to speak she struggled to stay together, looking to her friends for support every so often. What hurt the most was that she could not say what she really wanted to say about her mother to these people she'd called friends and to her mother. So much had been left unspoken. Maybe she would start a journal as McGonagall had suggested several times throughout the years. Who, if she was being honest with herself, she also resented in a since. The woman had known about the girls' plight these past few years and did nothing but offer advice that any fortune cookie could spew at her.

As she stood up there, reading over a well rehearsed speech it dawned on her just how alone and scared she was. Sure she had the marauders and Anna, but she was the older sibling. She was now the sole provider for her small family, which meant she had to stay strong. She had to be there to comfort Anna when she was sad. Though she did not resent the little girl as she did so many others, part of her wanted to, while the sensible side told her to keep it together and keep going. After all, that was what was expected of her. To take the mantle of both mother, father and older sister, all while finishing school. It was too much for one person to handle, but she had to and she would.

Once the speech was over she made her way down to the front row where Sirius offered a hug, but she politely declined opting to sitting down, legs crossed at the knees and hands resting firmly in her lap. It was the only thing keeping her together at that moment. It was the only thing keeping her grounded.

After the burial she and Anna stayed to receive well wishes and empty apologies from people they'd never see again. There was a point where all of their voices and words began to meld together. Their faces became blurred and their voices muffled by the loud ringing in her ears. In a moment hands were on her shoulders, on her hands, on her face. Someone's face was in hers and voices were shouting, though she could not tell through that excruciating ringing. Then just like that, she snapped. Pulling away from the hands and faces she heard what sounded like her voice shout 'STOP' before apparating away. Away from the lies, the voices. Away from any responsibility to herself and to her sister if only for just a moment.

When she finally stopped she found herself by the lake out behind the place she once called home. Tears running freely down her face smearing her make up. She kicked off those horrible shoes she ever so regretted buying and tossed away the hat to take in a deep breath. And in that moment she broke. Falling to her knees she cried for the mother she lost. She cried for the father she'd lost years ago. She cried for Anna who, so young, still managed to keep it together better than her. And finally, she cried for herself and her inability to deal with anything under the amount of pressure she was under.

For days she had tried to convince herself that she had to be brave. She had to keep it together for Anna, but the girl was doing ok. She had the marauders and Lily, but not her sister. Tabbitha realized she'd grown distant and cold in the short time. She'd already begun to push everyone away, and that was eating her up inside. Before that night she had been the happy go lucky Hufflepuff princess that everyone seemed to love and adore. She'd even managed to become friends with some Slytherins, who on their own weren't bad, but that girl was gone now. Now she felt empty, alone and lost, to name a few.

Before she was able to delve further into the abyss she'd already crawled into there was a pop from behind her signaling that someone had found her. Quickly wiping away the tears she pushed herself up nearly falling over in the process only to be caught by two strong arms that pulled her into the chest of her intruder.

"Shh, it's ok. Just let it out," mumbled Sirius, holding her close to him as he stroked her hair gently causing a new batch of tears to fall. Crumbling to her knees he went with her never once letting go.

"Why," she croaked, hiccuping in the process.

"Why what, dear," asked Sirius, with his chin resting her head.

"Why'd she do it," she said, pulling up slightly so that she could look up at him searching his for answers that she knew he did not have, but that she needed.

"Because she loved you." That was not the answer she wanted nor needed. Shoving him away she stumbled to her feet heaving as she did so.

"No! If she loved me she would have protected herself. Anna would have someone capable of taking care of her! If she loved me she would not have left me with a task I can not fulfill," she was screaming now, swatting at him to keep him away and when that wasn't working she pointed her wand at him.

Holding up his hand in defense he stepped forward only for her to push further. "I don't want to fight you, Tabbitha."

"I don't care what you want, Sirius," she spat, "if you step any closer I will hex you." And he knew she would if given the chance. So, he'd take that chance away from her before it came to that.

As he stepped forward in one swift motion he faintly heard people shouting his name, but he paid them no mind. Grabbing her wand he quickly pulled her towards him. Wrapping an arm around her waist he tossed the wand aside with her shoes and pinned her arms to her sides. She struggled for a minute, but he was stronger than she was thanks to her lack of quidditch practice over the summer. As she did so he stood firm waiting for her to calm down or at least give up, whichever came first.

"Is that how you really feel, Tabbitha," he screamed, having lost his patience with the girl who'd gone mad. When she did not reply he continued, "if not, then please for the love of Merlin tell someone how you really feel about all of this! You can't keep holding this! We've already seen what happens when you do that for too long and we don't want to see it get worse.

"I don't want to see you get worse," he added, in a much softer voice. Freeing her from his grasp he moved his hands to cradle her face in them as she wiped away the tears.

"Sirius, don't you think you're going a bit far." It was James that spoke up, but they paid him no mind as Lily smacked him in the arm promptly shushing him so that the other girl could speak.

"I'm scared. For three years, three long years I have felt alone, but not like today. I'm lost and I'm terrified of what the future holds for me and for Anna. How anyone expects, some seventeen year old witch who's still a child herself, to raise one on her own is beyond me. As you can see, I can barely keep myself together," pausing she took a deep breath closing her eyes, before continuing, "and to top it off I still have my N.E.W.T.S to worry about. I already know what career I want, but in order to do that I'll have to either step down as captain of my team or quit altogether." That comment alone caused James to protest again only to be slapped once more, but this time by Remus, who also shushed. "And to make things even better, we have nowhere to go at the end of term. No, I'm not putting you out like that.

"After all that is said and I done, I just don't know what to do," she sighed, dropping her gaze from his sniffling as a few stray tears ran down her face.

"I know and I understand, but at least think about it ok. And if not, stay with the Potters. They absolutely adore you and Anna, especially Mrs. Potter. Don't give me that look you know it's true. She loves having you girls around and you'd at least be able to save money till you do become an auror, which is what I assume you want to be." To which she nodded her slowly.

"That's settled then. You'll think about moving in with myself or the Potters and have your answer a month before we graduate. How does that sound," he said, letting go of her face as she wiped away any remaining tears with a soft smile.

"Sounds good. You know can be a real prat sometimes," she chuckled, still sniffling trying to keep the snot from falling. Realizing she probably looked like a hot mess.

"That's part of my charm, love," he said with a wink, as he tossed an arm over her shoulder causing her to chuckle. "Now, how's about we all get back to James' and feast on some delicious food?" All heads present nodded in agreement as they made their way to the McKinely's home having been made aware already that the fireplace in the sitting room was still connected to the floo network.

As they began to make the descent up the hill to her old home after having grabbed her things off of the ground Tabbitha got to thinking. "So, how'd you get here anyways? You're not old enough to apparate, and yet, that's the noise I heard earlier."

"Tilly brought me here. Sweet one that is. What are you going to do with her now that you'll no longer be living here?"

"Hmmm," she thought for a moment before calling out, "Tilly." In a flash the little elf was by her side.

"Yes, miss," implored the little elf.

"What does Tilly say about being a free elf," she said, pulling off one of her gloves. Tilly had been made her house elf behind her father's back during one of his many drunken nights.

"Oh no, Tilly could never leave Miss Tabbitha and Miss Anna," said the elf, shaking her head.

"It's alright Tilly. You don't have to leave us, but while we're in school you'll be more than welcome to pop on over to the Potters to help them out whenever needed. Also, you'll be getting paid weekly for your services. You're family after all," smiled Tabbitha, handing the glove over to the elf who had tears in her eyes.

"Thank you, miss. Thank you." With that she apparated away leaving Sirius and Tabbitha on the hill. After a moment of silence she stood up to her full height turning to look at him.

"You know what I just remembered that I forgot for a second there?"

"What's that," he asked with a smirk.

"I forgot I can apparate us there now." They both looked to the house realizing she could have gotten them all back without having to use the floo network. "Oh well," she shrugged with a grin as she held out her arm for him to take hold, "ready?"

"Actually, that reminds me. We never did celebrate your birthday properly," he said thoughtfully tapping his chin as if it had just dawned on him to which she just rolled her eyes.

"Oh shut up, Black, and grab on before I leave you here," she chuckled, as he grabbed onto her arm.

"But Tabbitha, we have to cele-," his sentence was cut short the moment she apparated them away from there and to the Potters. Once there she continued to decline any offers of celebrating her birthday as she made her way upstairs to her room all the while shaking her head.

"... and for the last time no," she laughed, shutting the door in his face so that she could change in peace. And with a shit eating grin he waltzed down the hall to his designated room. After that encounter something told him she'd change her mind about his proposal by the end of the year for sure.


	7. Chapter 7

September 1st found them on Platform 9 ¾ ready for board the train to Hogwarts for the last time. With Anna staring wide-eyed at the large red engine Tabbitha followed close behind James to get on. Inside it wasn't long before they found the rest of the small group of friends; Sirius, Remus and Peter who all greeted them upon entry.

"So James, you gonna finally tell us what this big surprise is," asked Peter excitedly as he sat at the edge of his seat.

With a grin he glanced around the compartment before pulling out a badge from inside his pocket. "Dumbledore made me Head Boy this year," he smirked, holding up the badge so that they all could see.

"No bloody way. Lily's going to have a fit," laughed Sirius, in that bark of a laugh of his.

While Remus just shook his head with sigh, "he's gone absolutely mad making you head boy of all people."

"Oh, why's that, Moony," asked James, shoving the pin back into his pocket.

"Because you're you, Prongs," he said, rolling his eyes.

"Aw, you're not jealous. Are you, Moony," laughed James, throwing an arm around his friend's shoulder as he, Peter and Remus sat on one side while the other three sat on the other.

"You found me out. I'm jealous of James Potter for getting Head Boy and not me," he said, pushing the now laughing boy's arm off of him.

"Oh come off it, Moon, it's not that big of a deal. Besides, I'm sure Lily made Head Girl, which only means one thing, ayyy," he said, waggling his eyebrows as he playfully poked the other boy in his ribs.

At this point the train had already begun rolling down the tracks. While the boys talked of all the mischief they'd get into Anna listened intently, chiming in every now and again, Tabbitha read a muggle book she'd found while out shopping with Lily the day before. They'd already bought all of their supplies for the year along with Anna's and had decided to have a girls' day for just the two of them, which consisted of shopping for books and eating lunch a small muggle cafe in London. She could still remember the conversation they'd had concerning a couple of mischievous boys.

* * *

For once the sky wasn't leaking and there were only a handful of clouds hanging above them. Maybe that's why they'd chosen that day to walk around muggle London. It had practically rained nonstop since the funeral and both girls were more than happy to accept the sunshine, no matter how minimal it was. At that point it was already past noon and both girls were starving. Having passed by a quaint little cafe they decided to stop there for lunch. Once they'd ordered their food though, Lily decided that was the perfect time to bombard her with a question she wasn't looking forward to.

"So, what's going on between you and Sirius," she said, as she took a delicate sip of the cola that she'd ordered.

"For the hundredth time, Lily. Nothing is going on between us," she huffed, ignoring her own drink in favor of leaning back in her chair with her arms crossed.

"Oh come off it, Tabby. You can't really expect me to believe that there's absolutely nothing going on between you and the womanizer Sirius Black. He did ask you to move in with him next summer, didn't he," she said, as she leaned forward in her own chair resting her arms on the table.

"Yes, but only temporarily till I could get job and find a place for myself and Anna."

"Is that what he said," asked Lily, raising one brow in question.

"Nooo, but-," she was quickly cut off by Lily before she was able to finish her retort.

"No buts, Tabbitha. Either Sirius Black likes you, or…," she said, pausing for dramatic effect, "he likes you. There's no other way around this, love. Face it, boys don't just ask girls to move in with them if they don't have any feelings for them."

"Oh yeah, and what about you and James? You sure there's nothing there, Lily?" At that point the food had arrived as they paused to thank their server before Lily sputtered out an 'absolutely not'.

"Besides, everyone knows that he likes me. I, on the other hand, don't ever plan on returning said feelings," she said, taking a bite out of her sandwich.

"Why not? And don't give me that he's insufferable, annoying, a prick, a right arse at times…,"

"Ok ok I get it. What's your point," she huffed, clearly agitated by the direction in which their conversation had gone.

"My point is, dear Lily, you two are meant for each other, and maybe this year you'll realize it. Now, what do you say to betting on how long it will take for the Marauders to get detention," she added at the end, quickly diverting the topic from their love lives, or lack thereof.

"Hmmm," said Lily, as if in thought, "two days."

"Alright. I say seven," said Tabbitha, with a little more confidence than necessary, but Lily didn't need to know that.

"What does the winner get," asked Lily, taking another bite of her almost finished sandwich.

"More like what the loser has to do. The loser has to accept the first date request they get to Hogsmead," she smile triumphantly.

"That's it? Oh, you are on," said Lily, mischief gleaming in her eyes as they shook hands on it. The rest of their day went by smoothly as they enjoyed their time together knowing that being in two separate houses, Tabbitha being Hufflepuff's quidditch captain and having NEWTS that year would prevent them from seeing much of each other. Still, Tabbitha was more than excited for the school year to start, though, she suspected that Lily wouldn't be if she knew why.

* * *

A tapping on her shoulder brought her back from the past as she blinked looking up from her book. At her side Anna was poking her arm. "Yes, love," she asked, putting her book down making sure to mark the page she was stopping on.

"Sirius said the trolly should be coming by soon. Can I have some candy, please," begged the little girl, clasping her hands together using her best puppy dog eyes. When she saw Sirius laughing at this she knew that he had put her up to the task. Sending a glare his way, which he only made him laugh more, she looked down at her sister with a sad smile.

"Not this time, love. Wouldn't want to ruin your dinner," she said, as she smoothed back some of the girl's unruly chocolate brown hair from her face. She resembled their mother for the most part, except for her eyes. Her eyes were a steely blue that she'd inherited from their father. Whereas Tabbitha looked exactly like their grandmother had at her age. Being a metamorphagus was just an added bonus as she often changed her hair color. For now though, she was opting for jet black hair tied up in a ponytail with bangs that went straight across her brow while on each side hair hung down framing her face perfectly. As much as she changed her hair, she never changed her eyes. They were the most perfect shade of forest green and she wouldn't have them any other way.

"Awww, but sissy," whined the little girl.

Shaking her head she briefly glanced up at Sirius who was only mildly chuckling. When he caught her eye he just shook his head before tapping Anna on the shoulder effectively gaining her attention. "How about this, on my first trip to Hogsmead and ones after I'll buy you any treat you want from Honeydukes. What do you say to that?"

Gasping she then looked at her sister expectantly. Sighing she let her head fall back for a moment before responding, "yes." Sitting up she added, "but only if you keep your grades up, understood?" To which that did not seem to deter the little girl as she bounced in her seat even more excited for the new year. "Why must you be such a bad influence?"

"It's part of my charm," said Sirius with a wink, to which she just rolled her eyes at.

"Anyways, Anna let's go get our robes on, ok." Grabbing the younger girl by the hand they made their way out of the compartment robes in hand as they looked for a place to change in private.

Once they got back though, they found a fuming redhead screaming at James. "Looks like someone found out," said Tabbitha stopping a few feet away. Barely having to push past them Sirius walked towards her stopping to turn around and watch the happy couple.

"Her face is about as red as hair, I'd reckon," he chuckled, hands shoved in his pockets.

It was then that Lily broke off screaming something inaudible as she threw her hands in the air storming off towards where the prefects were to meet with her and James. Passing by them she shot a glare at both Sirius and Tabbitha followed shortly after by James and then Remus, who just kept his head down. For a moment there was just silence as people filtered away from the scene before Sirius broke it.

"After you," he said, gesturing for her and Anna to take the lead back to the compartment where Peter still sat wide eyed in shock from Lily's outburst. Only nodding her head the girls did just that followed by him as they sat back down. They went back to Tabbitha reading, while Sirius told stories of the Marauders years thus far at Hogwarts. And though she did not like to admit it there was something endearing about the way he was towards her sister. Shaking her head of those thoughts she continued to read even when James and Remus had returned. For the rest of the train ride the boys goofed off with no sign of Lily ever showing up. Once at Hogsmead Tabbitha had to part ways with Anna who seemed terrified, but shuffled through the small crowd of first years to the boats. This was bound to be an eventful year.

* * *

 **Author's Note:** Apologies for the extremely late update. Was sick this past week and something major happened today, in a good and bad way. Anyways, only one update today as I have not written Chapter 8 yet. That being said, this is where you, my loyal readers, come in. You decide when and how the boy's get their first detention. Just make a comment and I shall select the one that seems to go best with the theme of this story. Thank you and happy reading!


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